This is the first update on our journey with our twin girls so far. One that the doctors are not hopeful about, but one we believe will be a testimony to the miraculous works of our Father God. The doctors come with many facts; many facts you can’t ignore. But, we stand on the Truth of God’s Word knowing that he can do exceedingly above all we can ask, think, or even imagine. He is the true healer. We want all of you to be a part of this journey with us as and stand with us for our girls and watching a miracle of wholeness take place.
Here’s our first update:
Friday, February the 13th, my husband (Kalen) and I were at Harris Downtown in Labor and Delivery, per our midwife and doula’s instruction. I had been leaking fluid off and on for a couple of hours and they needed me to get an immediate sonogram. As it turns out, my membranes had ruptured on Baby B’s (or Emery’s) sac and her amniotic fluid was low. It was still in a range that was healthy, but the fact my water had broken now initiated a lot more risks and new protocols.
Being that I was 17 weeks along at this time, there was nothing they could do, but send me home. However, this came with a slew of very traumatic realities thrown our way. First, we were advised to terminate. Uh, no. Next option please. The doctor said I was at risk now for going into labor within the next 24-72 hours and the chances of only having one baby and keeping the other one inside would be slim this early in the pregnancy. Neither baby would survive outside the womb. I was also told to watch for bleeding, cramping, and a fever over 100.4 which would all be indicative of infection and harmful to me as the mother; at which point he would not ask questions but induce labor to save my life, again, meaning my girls wouldn’t live. If I made it to Wednesday with none of those things happening, then they would recheck Emery’s fluid levels.
It IS possible for wombs to reseal, but if Emery’s fluid level remained low, I would continue monitoring, be placed on bed rest, watch for signs of infection, and hopefully make it to 22 weeks. At 22 weeks, the next step (in his opinion) was that I would be admitted into the hospital to finish out my pregnancy. He told us this “was necessary because once membranes have ruptured, you can go into labor at any time and VERY quickly and must be close to a neo-natal team.” At 24-25 weeks, the chances of survival are low. It is possible, but not without many long term complications. By 28 weeks, the chances of survival and health go up to 95%. Best case scenario, they try to get me to 34 weeks, at which point they induce. The babies are considered more than capable of survival and keeping them in any longer at that stage isn’t necessary. However, another bump in the road is Emery’s lungs. They not only have to mature, but must have the propensity for essential volume (meaning how much air they can take in). If Emery’s fluid remains too low the entire time, even with steroids, her lungs could have the maturity of a 34 weeker, but only the volume capacity of a 22 weeker-which means, there would be little chance she would survive on her own. A lot of information? Believe me, we got this in one 15 minute sitting, with a doctor who wasn’t hopeful and a “reality” that came so suddenly. I am so thankful my doula was there and my midwife was on speaker. We also had an amazing nurse who was a believer. Everytime the doctor came with death words, we had a 3 on 1 rebuking the words and replacing them with LIFE! Harris Downtown is the best option as far as skill and having the best NICU, but we are switching to a different doctor that is more aligned with life and hope.
My midwife and doula really encouraged me that sacs can reseal, that women leak all the time, and that rest is the best thing. They also told me that it was okay to grieve and have moments because this was very traumatic. My doctor assured me that it was nothing I had done, but that this was just a risk with twins.
We were going to do a gender reveal party to find out WHO was inside, but under the circumstances, Kalen and I needed to know because we needed to be praying right into their identities, by name.
Dylan Tatum means “Great Wave of Joy” (Baby A). We always felt like Dylan was our little warrior, strong physically, and maybe even a little on the wild side which is evidenced by her constant somersaults on sono. We felt like she would be the bigger twin and/or would come first.
Emery Olivia means “Brave and Powerful Peace”. Emery is also strong and a warrior, but as we prayed for names and the Lord gave us this one, we knew her strength was more internal; a quiet, steady strength. We believe she carries an innate sense of identity and who she is. We also felt like she would be the second one out and the smaller of the two.
Turns out our Dylan is on the bottom creating a protective barrier, and acting as a support for Emery who’s on top of her sister and higher in my uterus. This is a positive.
From Saturday to Wednesday I rested, we were at peace, with no fear. It was a strange peace that can only be deemed supernatural but we also knew we needed a miracle because at this early stage both our girls were at risk. I had experienced no leaking since Saturday morning (the doctor told me I would NOT stop leaking), and things were looking promising.
Wednesday came around and we were still at peace but oh so ready for great news. I have to say, Wednesday was harder than Friday. Dylan was swimming in an ocean of amniotic fluid (they are both in separate sacs with their own placentas; this is supposed to be the healthiest type of twins), and Emery looked like she was in a desert. She only had 1 cm of fluid around her and 2 cm is considered really low. I was so heartbroken, and I felt so helpless. Kalen and I left very discouraged, but not hopeless.
My girls are literally inside of me, a part of me, and there is nothing I can do. So close, yet so far away. Dylan’s sac had moved around even more creating a barrier, which is good news for keeping out infection. This could also be the reason why I’m not leaking anymore. We will go back in two weeks (20 weeks), and at that point our new doctor will check her growth and fluid level. It is encouraging that Emery has a bladder, which means she will keep peeing and, along with my body, she will continue to make fluid. However, the fact still stands, it might not be enough for her to sustain life unattached from me. Otherwise, baby girl has a strong heartbeat and looks good.
I am so thankful for my midwife and doula who are VERY confident that my sac can seal and that fluid can reaccumulate. However, that means I am on more bed rest for two weeks and drinking a gallon of water+ a day which has been shown to help.
So what are we looking at?
Right now, I’m on bed rest. COMPLETE bed rest, minus a shower, going to the bathroom, and getting breakfast. I’m allowed to do some gentle yoga/stretching because my body hurts from laying all day. Gallons of water. And waiting. And praying. And waiting. And praying.
What we need?
A COMPLETE miracle. Which is not impossible for our God. In two weeks, Emery’s fluid needs to triple, her growth needs to have shown signs of improvement, indicating that her sac has sealed itself. This is the best possible thing that could happen. God is the God of MUCH MORE, and we are believing for that. We are believing for HIS best for our whole family, especially Emery.
This is a journey I don’t think anyone who has been in this position thinks they could, or would face. It’s hard. It’s scary. It’s helpless. It means 150% trust in Jesus, in other words, all you have. It means, trying to find the balance between not being ignorant and being aware of what you’re facing, yet knowing GOD trumps all fact. All “impossiblities” become possible with Him.
We will continue to update you on our journey as we walk it out.
We ask that you stand with us from a place of PEACE and rest and for the miracle work of Jesus and for His best in this situation. We ask that you continue to thank God with us for Emery’s complete wholeness and thriving life; nothing less.
These are scriptures the Lord has given us to stand on in this time. I will put them here because where two or three are gathered in his name, He is here among us. (Matthew 18:20)
Thank you for standing with us in agreement.