The Pursuit of (My) Dreams: PART 2

Hello again! So this is part two of where I am going currently. If you haven’t read Part 1 you can do so by clicking here. I encourage you to read it if you haven’t because it gives a little background that might help all this gel a little better.

If you know me or follow me or have read ANY of “My Story” or the about.me section on the right side column of this page on my page, you already know that at the core of who I am it is family. My biggest dreams in life were to be a wife and a mother; always will be. Any other dreams that I have I wouldn’t say are “secondary” because they are just as much a part of me as being a wife and mother. They are still huge passions and ones that I know God has gifted me with and put in me to accomplish; but for me, my family is first and will always be my biggest passion, my bliss, and my first priority. Their dreams are just a as important to me as my own.

With that being said, the next biggest passion in my heart is health, fitness, and overall wholeness. In the about section on my page, I touch a little on my belief of being healthy and whole in every area. We are mind, body, spirit, so it’s important to be balanced in all areas to experience the fullness of a healthy, happy, and whole life. For me, working out is a quiet time. It’s so fun for me. I realize this is not true for everyone, but for me it just flows out of me. It’s not only a happy place for me, but it’s also a lifestyle. It’s as much a part of me as my own name. I knew that it would be what I did in life. I didn’t know what it all would look like, but I knew that being an ambassador for health and wholeness was a big part of my destiny and I want people to learn to really accept and love themselves in every stage of their “process”. I also hope that my passion for fitness and how fun it is for me spills over and creates that fun, enjoyable, light, and free atmosphere for others. It should be an outward expression of the love you feel for yourself on the inside, not another legalistic task to cross off your list so you can hopefully be brave enough to wear that swimsuit. Changing mindsets. Releasing freedom. Loving. Giving hope. These are a few of my favorite things.;)

When I was 16, I had done research and found an organization that just clicked for me. It is one of the top personal training certifications. It’s the National Academy of Sports Medicine (NASM). However, at 16, I was young and afraid, and thought that I really “needed” to go to college. I have nothing against college, but I do have a problem with society making it seem like you can’t and won’t thrive without a college education/degree. So, I decided that until I did that, then I couldn’t do much else yet. I was approached multiple times by instructors at my gym to get certified to teach a class. This, I thought, I could totally do while going to college: have an extra certification once I pursued personal training in the future, and make a little extra money in the present. So, at 18 years old, I got my certification in TurboKick through Powder Blue Productions. I started training to teach at my local gym. However, now I was taking my basics, but had no idea what I wanted to major in. On top of taking college courses, I was also leading worship for my youth group, and working part time. THEN–I got engaged. A dream was coming true…I was going to be a wife. Now with planning a wedding in the works, something had to take a backseat. It was just too much. Since I was only in the beginning phase of teaching at the gym, I knew that I needed to step back from that also knowing I could return later.

When my husband and I got married, he was midway through his college career as a History Major. Working full-time and going to school full-time. Still really not interested or even knowing what it was I wanted to do for my college career, I decided to just work instead of waste money on a major I might end up changing later. I was only 19 when I got married so I wasn’t concerned about time. I knew I had enough time to just figure it out and I also know that I am a self starter. When I found what I loved to do or wanted to pursue, I knew I would do it without hesitation even if that meant going back to college at a later time. But, I was also okay if college was something that never fit the bill for me either. There were times when it felt like it could be “my time” to pursue my dreams, but I was young, perfectionism had a heavy hold on my life, and so inevitably fear would come and make me feel like I wasn’t fully equipped or that I wouldn’t want to do something and fail, or that it needed to be the perfect thing before I took a risk and pursued it. CRAP. Total crap.

To save you years of details, I will make this as concise as possible…

The Lord really set me free from that hold perfectionism had on me and started showing me that if you fail, it at least means you tried. He showed me that not everything has to be rationally sound for me to take the first step. A lot of the way we grow and learn is through trying, taking risk, being okay to mess up, get up and move forward better equipped.

With new tools in hand and a courageous heart, I was going to pursue my dreams and see where it took me. If I failed, I failed, but I knew God always had me and had a plan to get me where I needed to go. Then…I found out I was pregnant. The next big dream of my heart was coming true–being a mother.

See I could have looked at all this as set backs, but they were ALL dreams of my heart and I had to trust the Lord’s timing. Was it disheartening at times? Yes. I really wanted this specific dream to come true at some point, but all of these things that the world could look at as setbacks were a testing ground and ultimately revealed God’s goodness and faithfulness. At this point, my husband found his calling which was to be a teacher and so getting his teacher certification was the next step. This requires a lot of money, but he would finally have his career and to see my husband’s dreams come true is and will always be a desire of my heart. Practically, we needed a good, sound career with a child now, so we pursued that. I knew that once he was settled into teaching, and our son got a little older, that I would be able to pursue my other dreams outside of wife and mom. If there is anything I’ve learned over the years, it’s that I can plan and dream, and have goals and vision, and that God loves that planning part of me–He put it in me after all. I’ve learned that He loves my dreams, too–He put those in me as well. But, most importantly, I’ve had to learn to leave room for the things HE has planned for me, the dreams in His heart for me, that are inevitably going to be my dreams too, I just may not know them yet; and, ultimately, to sometimes (most of the time), have my “perfect” plans messed up at the wonderful sake of truly getting HIS best for me. This, my friends, was a journey I resisted for awhile, would create high expectations without the willingness to budge-even for God even though I knew His ways were best- and ultimately, disappointment when things wouldn’t go my way. In the end, I would always come around because the end result was always better than my initial plan. But God didn’t want me to live a life so resistant and rigid. He wanted the direct relationship between us to flow in a beautiful dance of all the ways He created me to be a planner, and a driven personality who carefully marks all the options, weighs them, and crafts a great plan of action, but who also is easily willing to toss all that aside to walk with freedom, blind faith, and courageous hope when He says He has a better way. This changed my life forever when this revelation took root and I’ve never been the same.

Today, 1 year after having my son, being passionate about health and fitness since the age of 13, knowing I wanted to become a Certified Personal Trainer (CPT), and many more dreams relating to that, I can say that God has finally opened the doors for me to pursue getting my Personal Training Certification through NASM. I’m still in a little bit of shock. It’s surreal. He’s so far not left one dream untouched. I’m a wife, a mother, and now I will be a trainer. I’m doing it…before the end of this year…I declared it…I worried it wouldn’t happen…but, I trusted anyway…and he kept His word like he always does! All the other dreams I have in my heart that haven’t come to pass yet don’t worry me. He is faithful and He wants so much for me. I have no doubt that together all my dreams will come true. But, it’s not just about GETTING the dream. I’ve realized the best part is the journey with Him in all of it and discovering deeper parts of His heart for me and, in turn, deeper parts of my own heart and the dreams there that He has yet to show me. The journey is the best part guys. It’s worth whatever wait you may be in. His timing is perfect and He is a good God!

I’m so happy to share this with all of you! I’m ready to start my career in loving people and changing lives inside and out. I’m ready to grow and learn through it all.

Upcoming changes will be as follows:

-I will be changing my Facebook page name to Caitlin Dermott Fitness 

-As well as my Fitness Instagram to @caitlindermottfitness.

Everything is a process, but I will also be changing my YouTube name to Caitlin Dermott Fitness.

I think it’s important to brand myself and I want to be reachable to everyone. This will be a huge way of marketing myself and my business to clients. If you aren’t following me yet, I would love for you to do so. Also, please share my page, invite your friends to like and follow me as well!

I was previously Stay At Fit Mom on Facebook and @stayatfitmom on Instagram.

I will be making the changes slowly so that my current followers aren’t confused.

Go ahead and click to follow and like my page now as it still is if you’re new to reading this, or for my current followers, just keep in mind it will be changing to the names above.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading and following my journey!

Much love friends,

Cait

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